Twins

I Stopped Being Mom and Found My Own Adventure

It was 8 a.m. as I stood in the dusty parking lot, the hot summer sun already beating down on my sunscreened arms. I scanned the faces of each hiker as she passed, hoping to recognize any of them as members of my local women’s fitness group. Instead of our regular indoor exercise class, we had planned to meet at the trailhead of a 4-mile mountain hike just outside of town.

But no one else showed up.

The clock was ticking and the sun was rising higher in the sky. I figured the hike just wasn’t meant to happen today. I mean, by the time I got to the top I’d be melting in the heat. Plus, there was so much at home that needed to get done. My kids and husband were good sports about me going out for some exercise but I felt a little guilty about taking off on an adventure by myself. Anyway, I’d never hiked that trail before and it was probably too strenuous for someone as out of shape as myself.

Somewhere in the midst of self-doubt and mom-guilt, a tiny voice inside me began making an argument in favor of the adventure.

So I Stopped Being Mom and went on an Adventure

I took a deep breath and charged onward and upward. There was no knowing if the path ahead was going to be steep or rocky (it was both), or if I was going to be strong enough to make it to the top. But I sure as heck wasn’t going to let this turn into a missed opportunity.

I set a slow, steady pace and stuck with it, hoping to not burn out before reaching the summit.

Without anyone else to talk with, I had two hours alone with my own thoughts. As I plodded up that mountain I evaluated my progress in meeting life goals, how I can pursue my passions, and where I see myself in 5 years. These are things that I believe are important aspects of my identity, yet I never really put much thought into them.

What had started out as a fun fitness outing was also quickly turning into a test of perseverance. I was beginning to feel like Super Woman on a mission. If I could just finish this hike, was there anything I couldn’t do? I know it’s only 4 miles. But for a mom who has really been neglecting her workouts, (and did I mention it was HOT?), this was a big deal.

That’s how my Saturday started. If you want to see the hike, it’s in the Snapchat Saturday video below. You can also watch last week’s Snapchat Saturday video here.

Sometimes you have to stop being Mom, or whatever responsibility it is that defines you, and find your own adventure. Life is too short to miss an opportunity for adventure.

What adventure do you see on the horizon?

A Day in the Life of a Twin Mom | Snapchat Saturday

If you haven’t heard, I’m on Snapchat… And I’m kind of obsessed. 🙂 I’ve always wanted to do a day in the life of a twin mom kind of post because I feel like people give me too much credit for what I do. I get a lot of “I don’t know how you do it” kind of comments when I’m out with my brood of little ones. But really, I’m just making it through day by day the same as anyone else.

The only downside to “ a day in the life” kinds of posts is that, even if you crunch it waaaaaayyy down, it’s hard to squeeze your whole day into a single blog post or video.

That’s where Snapchat is pretty handy. Since snaps can only be 10 seconds long, a whole day’s worth only boils down to a 2 or 3 minute video. I like that, and I hope you do too. This Saturday was super mellow because we didn’t have a baseball game, birthday party, or any other responsibilities. It was just us hanging out as a family.

A Day in the Life of a Twin Mom | Snapchat Saturday

Now for a little commentary on this video:
The idea came to me as I was in one room and the kids were in the other. As I listened in on their conversation I just melted at the cuteness going on over there. Like when we were in the fabric store and the girls were going gaga over all the “fluffily” cloth. Or Baby John was singing to himself in his crib at nap time. I really wanted to document those sweet little moments. They’re so fleeting.

I didn’t get a ton of sweet moments in my snaps, unfortunately. And of course every time someone did something absolutely adorable it’s not like you can have them do it again so you can record it. Life isn’t like that. I did, however, get a lot of ‘real life’ in the video. It’s funny because one twin was not having a good day, and she’s usually not such a stinker. But Saturday was not the best representation of my darling Madeline. She refused to go down the stairs or get out of the car and she cried when I gave her ice cream. Of course, today she’s a sweet little thing, totally the opposite from yesterday.

Also, Logan is not represented in this video because he isn’t home until the 5th. He’s been at his dad’s for half the summer, only coming home for a night every now and then. I miss him terribly, and will probably do this again when he can be in the video with us.

When Snapchat first debuted I definitely turned my nose up at it because I figured it was just a way for pervs and party kids to share dirty photos without their parents finding out. But I think, like any online tool, it’s going to be as rated-G as you want it to be. You just have to make sure that you’re following people that you can trust not to post things you don’t want to see. If you’re on Snapchat find me at thesebusydays. Don’t worry, you can trust me. 😉

12 Ways We Financially Prepared for Twins

12 financial planning ideas for couples who are wanting to start saving money before the arrival of their baby twins. If you are wondering about stretching your budget to fit the needs of twins, you can find some advice here. New moms, check this first before preparing a financial plan for your newborn babies.

Twins are an amazing treasure. With how often they draw the attention of people as they pass, it’s impossible not to be constantly reminded of the tremendous blessing that these little oddities of nature are. But when we first found out we were expecting twins, one of our biggest joy-crushers was the fear of how we were going to afford them. As early as the first trimester, I started working to make sure that we were financially prepared for twins. It took a little more effort to save money, but it was totally worth it.

We financially prepared for twins by examining the cost

What’s the expense parents loathe the most? Daycare. For about 5 months we struggled financially as almost an entire paycheck from my husband’s job was signed away to daycare costs. Whether both parents worked or not, we were broke either way. As much as I never thought we could survive as a family of 5 (and growing!), we had to face reality and take the kids out of daycare to stay home with Daddy. The issue of affording childcare was the biggest financial struggle we faced financially, and there was really no way to prepare for it. But with belt tightening, grit, determination, and creative thinking we have been able to make it on my pennies teacher’s salary so John could be home with the kids. You’d be surprised how manageable it is to go down to one income, and the benefits of having your children home with you are tremendous.

We began with the “end” in mind

Since I knew we couldn’t financially prepare for the cost of daycare, I started early with preparing for other expenses, like diapers. Every time we went grocery shopping we’d buy a single package of diapers. Spreading out the expense over time meant that when the girls came we didn’t have to buy diapers for almost 9 months! It’s a good idea to stockpile other non-perishables, like store bought baby food and wipes.

Reusing and recycling

We reached out to our friends and family and asked for any baby- or pregnancy-related items that they were willing to hand down to us. Amazingly, we ended up with TWO cribs, plenty of maternity clothes, and little girl clothes up to age 2! I also kept an eye on the forums in our local Twin Parents club website. It’s how I ended up with the nursing pillow that helped me with breastfeeding twins.

What if breastfeeding doesn’t work out?

If you subscribe to the Huggies, Enfamil, Similac or Honest emails or mailing lists, they often send out coupons for formula and other baby items. I saved these coupons just in case breastfeeding was too hard with twins.

Thrift shop, baby!

For necessities like maternity clothes for twins, which I was only going to need for a few months, I made do with thrift store finds. We ended up getting so many baby clothes from friends and family that we didn’t need to go into the children’s section of the thrift shop. Between secondhand shops and visiting yard sales, I was able to fully stock the nursery (including a $10 glider!). What I hadn’t thought about, even though this wasn’t my first pregnancy, was how I would also need larger-than-usual clothing for AFTER the girls came. I didn’t exactly “bounce back” to my old shape but I was plenty “bouncy” in the midsection for at least a year. 😉

Let’s be real:

I had to be realistic about what I could and couldn’t afford. I wanted new cribs and playpens, but settled for hand-me-downs that were in great shape. We chose generic over name-brand baby products and found them to still be of good quality. When friends and family asked what I needed, I would ask for diapers or for them to buy us the things we wanted but didn’t really need, like cute designer outfits and fancy baby toys.

One is enough

At first we didn’t buy two of each of the more expensive baby items. We bought one, gave the babies a chance to use it and considered if they like it enough to make it worth getting a second one. The girls absolutely hated the baby swing, so thankfully we only had to pack one up to return it. We also were able to last a long time with only one crib because we had our twins sleep in the same crib.

Bank sick days

My job allowed my sick days to roll over to the next year, and those got used up first when I went on maternity leave with the twins. As a teacher, I can’t collect State Disability Insurance, so I planned ahead and signed up for short-term disability insurance through my employer’s benefits provider. This actually helped us out a lot because the insurance granted me 60% of my pre-tax paycheck, and since I had a lot of deductions taken out of my check for health and dental insurance, taxes, union dues and retirement, my maternity leave checks were bigger than what I was used to!

Calling all angels!

Bringing twins into the world is as exhausting as it is rewarding. Two of my mom’s friends were kind enough to come and help around the house about once a week, which totally saved my sanity. It got to where I’d just leave the dishes and pile of clean laundry because I knew they were coming the next day to help with housekeeping. Before the twins arrive, I strongly suggest lining up volunteers to come over and help with housework. Once the babies come you’re too overwhelmed to do it all.

For dinner we’re having…?

A few other thing that can be arranged in advance are a Meal Train and groceries. During the first 2-3 months, the days were such a blur that we were just trying to survive newborn twins on little sleep. Trying to wrap our heads around dinner plans or the contents of the pantry was more than we could handle. Thankfully, our friends and family pitched in to provide us with a delivery of groceries. There is also a website, mealtrain.com, where your friends can sign up for nights to bring over dinner.

Thinking long-term

Twins, or just children in general, are expensive. Their wants and needs just get more and more pricey as they grow older. I can’t even fathom having to pay for two weddings. Thankfully that challenge is still a looooong way off. However, we recently set up a 529 college savings plan for the twins. It’s a great investment because the savings can only be used for college expenses, of which there are plenty!

Join the Amazon Family

Did you know you can join Amazon Family and get discounts on diapers? Plus they offer a variety of coupons and discounts on products for babies and toddlers. We used Amazon Family (formerly Amazon Mom) when the twins were little, and since we’re already Prime members we get our orders in 2 days or less.

When you are expecting twins, it’s a good idea to save money wherever you can. We wanted to have enough in the bank so that we didn’t have to worry about expenses, and could focus on enjoying our new babies. It’s ok to ask your friends and family to pitch in, since bringing home newborn twins is likely to be the biggest challenge you will face as a parent.

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Hello sunny days!?? ?? Being at home is not so bad when your sister is your best friend. ???? ?? I busted out my big camera for some family pics. ? This is a great time to jump back into an old hobby! Have you started or picked up an old hobby during shelter in place? ?? . . . . . . #cameramama #selfcareformoms #thehappynow #momplusjoy #simplychildren #sandiegomom #twinsisters #bestfriendsforlife #twinning #sistersquad #ipreview via @preview.app
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6 Things I’m Learning as a Twin Parent

With every new transition in life come the opportunity to learn and grow as an individual. My greatest change so far has been when we welcomed our twins Madeline and Emily into our lives. Raising twins was a whole new parenting challenge, full of surprises. I’ll be the first to say that I’m not perfect. Thankfully, being a parent of twins has taught me about myself and has helped to make me a better person.

6 things I’m learning as a twin parent

Patience

There’s nothing like having two newborns crying at the same time to really test your patience. But more than that, raising twins is just plain hard work. It’s twice the little feet to put shoes on, twice the little bottoms to wipe… Caring for babies times two means that everything takes twice as long. I’ve learned not to rush them. To let them be little. I may want them to hurry up now, but in a short time I know I’ll miss these days.

Love

When your children arrive, even when it’s two at once- you’ll be amazed at how much love you feel. Before the girls came I was worried that I wouldn’t have enough time, energy, attention, and love to go around for all my children. But that hasn’t been the case at all. My love for them doesn’t run out. If anything, the more tired I am, the more I love them. Because all I want to do when I’m exhausted and worn down is to cuddle with my little guys.

Innovation

I’ve learned that it helps to be creative. For example, the twins had just turned 2 when baby #4 was born. They still needed me to hold their hands everywhere we went. But if I was carrying the baby, I only had one free hand. One day while I was trying to safely herd the girls across the street, I stuck out the pinky and thumb of my free hand and told each girl to grab on. A year later and we are still using that system for hand-holding.
Another way we’ve had to be creative was when we were dealing with the issue of feeding 2 babies at the same time. When you have to get ready for work, but both babies need to be fed, you just do what you gotta do. I breastfed and supplemented, and got really creative at propping babies and bottles when I was pressed for time.

Humility

I finished putting myself through college as a 24-year-old single mom, which sounds like a great accomplishment. Unfortunately, my greatest achievement made me a very prideful person. I had this idea in my head that I was good at everything. Whatever way I chose to do something, it was the right way. Of course, all of that hot-headedness flew out the window when I had two babies on my hands at no clue what to do with them. It turned out I wasn’t the expert on everything after all. It was very humbling to admit to myself and others that I didn’t know what to do, I couldn’t do it on my own, and I was pretty sure I was messing it all up in the process.

Strength

The last few years have been an exercise in my strength both physically and emotionally. Carrying two babies, pushing two babies in a stroller, lugging all the extra stuff you need to bring to leave the house with two babies… And then adding a third baby to the mix 2 years later. I tell you, it’s been an exhausting, wild ride. I’ve adapted to living on very little sleep. I’ve lifted and buckled and supported and held tight babies and toddlers for the last 3 years. Through it all I’ve also grown stronger in my faith.
And every second of it has been worth it.

Dependence

I was the oldest of six kids in my family and I was homeschooled. Those two factors created an incredibly independent, driven, personality in me. As a parent I’ve had to learn to let go of a lot of that. I’m simply not capable of doing everything. I work full-time, we have sports and church and birthday parties and family get-togethers that, while they are a lot of fun, take up much of my free time. Along with admitting to myself that I just can’t do everything, I’ve also had to learn to rely on others. I’ve had to learn to recognize when I need help, and then go out and ask for it. That aspect of releasing control, allowing others to step in and take over, has probably been the hardest thing for me to learn.

The journey of parenting and maturing as an adult is such a serious one, isn’t it? Raising twins, or any other life change for that matter, is a great opportunity to examine how we’ve grown and changed as individual. For me, becoming a mother of twins has been my greatest life change so far.

So what about you? What life changes have you experienced that have made you a better person?

Multiples Illuminated Review

Disclaimer: I received a free .pdf copy of this book but the opinions expressed here are my own. Some links may be affiliate.

A few years ago a childhood friend found out she was pregnant with twins. She didn’t know many people who had twins so we sat down together one afternoon and hashed it all out. We covered topics like what the pregnancy might be like, what help she will need once they arrive, breastfeeding twins, and on and on.

To be honest, each mom’s experience with twins is different from the next. Every family comes with their own set of struggles and triumphs, and there is a lesson to be learned from the challenges they’ve faced. That’s why I think the book Multiples Illuminated is ideal for any mom-of-multiples-to-be. It’s packed with stories written by women who carried twins or triplets.

Multiples Illuminated is encouraging

When my twins were first born, I was so overwhelmed. I desperately needed to hear that I was going to be ok, that things will get easier. The personal stories in this book do just that. I’m amazed at how every type of mother (and father!) of multiples is represented here. From struggling with infertility to what to do on bed rest to finding out you’re having triplets to visiting your babies in the NICU, a piece of me can relate to every voice on these pages. From them I hear the glorious messages of hope, survival, bravery, and love.

From Multiples Illuminated Facebook

Multiples Illuminated gives you the whole scoop

This is not just a book of stories, my friends. The two main authors wisely included practical “what do I need for___” lists. Through the narratives, you get an idea of what it may be like to have one twin born with a learning disability, how to manage getting out of the house with two babies, and much more.

… And a bit of humor!

An excerpt from one of the essays, The Main Attraction by Briton Underwood pretty much sums up every parent of multiples’s experience in public:

“Did you plan them?” You don’t plan twins. How would you do that? Yeah, my wife planned to knock it all out in one pregnancy. We wanted one of them to be a girl, but that would have taken even more planning.
“Do twins run in your family?” Well, you can see they certainly don’t walk. Excuse me while I chase down those two wonders headed towards the candy aisle.

Be sure to find Punk Rock Papa on Facebook. He’s hilarious!

Having twins is like becoming a first time mom all over again, which makes it doubly scary if your twins are your first babies! I can’t stress enough the power in the words on these pages to lift up and warm the hearts of parents of multiples. Order a copy for a gift to a mom of multiples. This makes a perfect baby shower gift, too!

Find out more at www.multiplesilluminated.com.

Twins in One Crib or Two?

When we were expecting our twins, one of the questions people always asked us was whether we would put our twins to sleep in one crib or two cribs. Sleeping arrangements for your twins is a big deal because you want to do what’s best for them, and after about day 2 you will realize that you REALLY want to do whatever gets you the most sleep at night. When it comes to making the big decision about their cribs, safety should be your number one concern. Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links. If you choose to click through to buy, at no additional cost to you, the company sends me a few pennies. Your support of this blog is much appreciated.

Do you want them to cosleep?

Cosleeping twins share a crib space and go to sleep at the same time. Putting them to bed at the same time is ideal, whether or not they are in the same crib. Until they start to move around too much it is safe for them to share a bed. For the first few weeks, twins sleep better when placed near each other. As they grow and learn to move, one wiggly twin scooting around can wake up the other twin. Our twins actually slept just fine in one crib until they were a year old. HOWEVER, since that time I have heard numerous stories of mothers who lost a twin due to an incidence of SIDS. The American Academy of Pediatrics advises against putting twins in one crib because the risk of SIDS is increased for low-birthweight babies and when babies share a crib. For more information on safely putting your twins to sleep, visit SIDS and Kids or read this publication.

How much room do you have?

When our twins were little, we didn’t know that twins weren’t supposed to be in the same bed. We were short on space, so we only had room for one crib in our room. This was a few years before the space- and budget-friendly Swaddle Me By Your Side Sleeper. We would have definitely used that if it was available back then! They both slept in the same crib in our tiny bedroom for a full year. That’s a long time to have to sneak around the room at bedtime! But it was convenient keeping them in the room with us. Newborn twins come with two times the nighttime wake-ups. Ours were within 2 feet of Mommy and Daddy so getting up to help them find their pacifier every few hours was no big deal. If your bedrooms are small but you want separate cribs, another option would be to put one crib or Pack and Play in the living room and one in the bedroom. Dad’s Guide to Twins has more crib arrangement ideas for small space living.

how do you decide if you put your twins in one crib or two

A Pack ‘N Play with a double bassinet keeps both babies close by and safe!

What is your budget like?

Don’t we all wish we could just go on a shopping spree before setting up the nursery? If it is in your budget to have matching cribs and bedding, you might as well get two right away. We didn’t have it in our budget to buy two brand-new cribs, but we got lucky with hand-me-downs. 2 different friends had a crib they wanted to get rid of, and they were both similar in color and design. If your budget is tight, keep your eyes peeled for nursery gear at garage sales and thrift stores, and ask around. Cribs are a big ticket item that parents hang on to long after they are outgrown, and they are usually happy to donate or resell a crib to someone who needs it. Also, check out our 12 tips for financially planning for twins.

When it comes to deciding if you want your twins in one crib or two, my best advice is to put them in separate cribs just to be on the safe side. Even though our twins co-slept, I was constantly worried that one was going to smother her sister while they slept. You’re going to need a second one sooner or later, and once the twins arrive life gets pretty crazy. Twins often arrive earlier than expected, so it’s best to be prepared and have a second crib ready. That way you can sleep better knowing your twins are sleeping safely.

Are you or someone you know expecting twins? You might also like this post on what to expect as a postpartum mom of twins.

Maternity Clothes for a Twin Pregnancy

Getting ready for the arrival of twin babies is an incredibly exciting and joyful time. Maternity clothes are going to play a big role in your twin pregnancy. But shopping for them can pose a dilemma because you don’t want to be wasteful. You don’t want to buy a bunch of outfits in advance only to find out they aren’t going to fit later on. Even if you come across a great sale, there are a few reasons why it’s best not to buy a lot of maternity clothes right away. Moms of multiples do have some maternity clothes recommendations, which I’ll share below as well.

Young pregnant woman relaxing in park outdoors, healthy twin pregnancy

Reason number 1: No two pregnancies are the same.

You don’t know how your body is going to develop or how fast it is going to grow during a twin pregnancy. Just because you may have gained a lot of weight with your first pregnancy does not mean that you will gain as much with this one. It may seem like a good idea to buy a size up because it should fit, but you may be surprised at how fast you will grow. It is best not to buy the next size until you are close to needing it and know it will fit.

Reason number 2: Every woman develops at her own rate.

You simply can’t predict what your pregnancy is going to be like based on the experiences of someone else. There is no ‘normal’ when it comes to pregnancy. My twin pregnancy story was different from that of other women I know. Some women have to be put on bed rest early on while others maintain a busy lifestyle right up until their babies are born. Doctors and scientists can come up with some good mathematical averages, but each woman will still experience a growth rate different from the next.

Reason number 3: Your comfort level is very likely to change the farther along you are in your twin pregnancy.

What feels comfortable in the beginning may not be comfortable by the end of your pregnancy. If your babies are growing straight out in front, the pants that you thought would last you for three trimesters might be causing you to itch like crazy as the skin on your belly stretches. Or you may find that as your belly grows, your dresses will start to pull up pretty high in the front. Dresses that began at a nice knee length will be showing off your thighs and more the closer you get to the end of your pregnancy. If you plan to buy in advance, maxi dresses are probably the safest bet.

I’ve spoken with my fellow twin moms about their maternity clothing and noticed similarities in what other moms experienced. For one, carrying twins makes your belly grow – BIG! It’s ok if the only thing that fits you in the maternity section are the plus size outfits, even if you weren’t a plus size before. Another complication that twin moms experience is, because your belly is so big, the average maternity shirt won’t fully cover you in front. And pants can be very uncomfortable. Towards the end of your pregnancy, you may want to get creative about wearing dresses. If you’re pregnant during the winter, use layers to keep warm. Personally, I couldn’t see spending piles of money on clothes that wouldn’t fit in a few months, so I shopped at thrift stores for maxi dresses and long cotton dresses. These were great because I ended up wearing them long after the babies were born too!

Maternity clothes shopping can almost be a gamble because it’s hard to know when advance what your body is going to look like 4 or 5 months from now. Don’t get too caught up in shopping for maternity clothes. It’s best to think twice before loading up your shopping bag since you have no idea how your twin pregnancy is going to go. Take clothes shopping slowly, buying only a little bit at a time. This way you can be sure to get the best value for your money.

When Raising Twins is Awesome

Twins bring with them a whole new set of parenting challenges. Sometimes the double diapering, endless sleepless nights, and tandem crying can seem hard to bear. But alongside the hardships are countless moments that fill your heart with joy. These are like small treasures found along a steep and rocky path. They make you want to keep on going, even though the journey may be hard.

Twins have a special connection between each other. Sharing a womb is only the beginning of the closeness that they have. It’s a uniquely special experience to actually see their relationship develop over time. Not much can compare to the joy you feel when your twins share a moment of bonding.

Over the years, I’ve come to realize that raising twins is awesome when…

They make each other laugh.
Fairies are born from the deep, belly laughs of a baby, right? Hearing one baby giggle hysterically puts a smile on anyone’s face. But two babies laughing together? Cutest thing ever. These aren’t my babies but their laughing brightens my day. 🙂

They play together.

The bonus of having more than one child is that they entertain each other, and twins come with a built-in buddy. Sometimes their little games provide entertainment for Mama as well. twins playing a game

One afternoon my twins spent who-knows-how-long sitting on the kitchen floor and taking turns wearing a bowl as a hat. After a split second of “why do I bother buying toys?”, I sat back in amusement and just enjoyed watching them be silly together. Of course, having a buddy often crosses the line to a ‘partner in crime’. When they play together it is almost always messy. raising twins is awesome

They cuddle. why raising twins is awesome

The angelic peacefulness of a sleeping child is multiplied when twins snuggle. Ours shared a crib, and when we put them in “big girl beds” it took a while for them to get comfortable sleeping alone. twins sleeping together They still prefer to watch movies under the covers in Mommy’s bed.

They have a conversation in their own little language.

I recorded a few times when our twins were talking in a language that I’m not even sure they understood. A few words made sense to me but for the most part I have no clue what they were saying. It’s mind-blowing that their little minds made a way to communicate to each other before they could put together regular words.

They match. why raising twins is awesome
Is it me or are twins exponentially cuter when they’re decked out in matching outfits? cute matching twins and why raising twins is awesome Whether they are same-gender or boy-girl twins, you get way more declarations of “Oh, look at the cute twins!” from people when you dress your twins to match.

They can’t stand to be apart.
raising twins is awesome

This is when you can really tell how strong their love is for one another. Like when one twin goes to Urgent Care for an ear infection and the other one is at home repeatedly asking for her sister. Or when one wakes up early and wants to go wake up her sister (except you never wake Madeline before she’s ready ;). They simply do not like to be separated.

Sure, there will be times when they will make their parents, and each other, crazy. But in between the madness and the chaos will be moments that you will treasure forever. These two little creatures that you brought into this world will make you laugh, fill your heart with joy, and change your life in ways you never expected were possible. Raising twins is hard and tiring and incredibly gratifying all at the same time.

Parents of twins are truly twice blessed.

When I Was Expecting Twins, I Wondered…

Nobody can realistically plan or be prepared for twins. In our case, it was a tremendous shock when we found out we were about to be twice blessed! As I started mentally preparing for their arrival, I had a lot of questions about what it would be like. I knew all about pregnancy and caring for a ‘singleton’. But twins? This was all new territory for me and John!

As soon as I announced the big news, people asked me about having twins. It’s like I was some sort of twin expert just because I was carrying two babies in my tummy.

This prompted me to I do some research about twin pregnancies and raising twins. These are the things I wanted to know about when I was expecting twins.

Where did they come from?

That was the first thing most people asked me, and I didn’t have a very good answer for them. I was blown away when the ObGyn said “It’s twins!”, because they don’t really ‘run in our family’. We didn’t use IVF and so far as I know we aren’t genetically inclined to have twins. I desperately searched the internet for an answer to that question. And I found out a whole lot of nuthin’. My best guess is that for some reason I dropped two eggs and Bam! Twin babies. End of story (or was it just the beginning? 😉

Will I get double the maternity leave?

The way I see it, two times the babies should equal two times the maternity leave, amIright? But apparently that’s not how it works. Twin mommas only get medical ‘disability leave’ for the same 6 weeks postpartum as mommas of singletons. You can take more time off, but unless your family can make do without your income, you can’t use disability insurance to supplement your salary while you’re off. In my case, I unfortunately developed pretty intense postpartum depression and ended up needing an extra 2 months home while I worked through all of that. You can read more of my twin maternity leave story here.

Will they be identical?

I so badly wanted identical twins! I don’t know why, I just thought it would be so cool. There is a test you can run on your babies to see if they are genetically identical. We chose not to do that because, well, to us they didn’t really look that identical. Also, our ObGyn said they weren’t identical because they were in separate placentas.

Will I have to have a C-Section?

With as much energy as I put into my desire to have identical twins, my feelings were exponentially stronger against having a C-Section. I’ve never had one, and I’ve heard way too many horror stories from women who have. My respects to you mommas! At the end of the third trimester, the babies were in a favorable position to be delivered vaginally. Our labor and delivery went smoothly, but because it was a twin delivery I was wheeled into an operating room for the final stage of labor (more on that here).

Can I breastfeed them?

I asked my doctor about this and she didn’t have a lot of info for me. I checked out books from the library, watched videos and read online articles for advice on breastfeeding twins. None of that prepared me for how hard it was going to be. For one, I am not a very great milk producer. Even with one baby, Johnny, I would often go a full workday without a break (cuz, teacher) and have no discomfort. With the twins I pumped in between every feeding and right after every feeding for 5 months in hopes of building up enough milk, all to no avail. You can read my breastfeeding twins confessional if you want more detail. Although you can breastfeed twins, and many people do, I was not able to exclusively breastfeed mine… But I did everything in my power to try!

Will I have to go on bed rest?

I had mixed feelings on the idea of bed rest. While it would be like a vacation to have to be off work, being on hospital bed rest sounds awfully boring. Then there’s that gross cafeteria food they feed you. Eeew. I knew a girl who was off work because of a “modified” bed rest. She was out of the hospital but couldn’t drive anywhere or be upright for too long. No driving?! Heaven help me! My ObGyn dutifully informed me that bed rest could be a possibility, and often is for women pregnant with twins. Thankfully, I was able to make it to 37 weeks and 3 days without any problems!

For all the worrying I did about my twin pregnancy, everything worked out pretty well. I know this is not the case for so many women. Twins tend to come early and complications during a twin pregnancy are not uncommon. You just never know what kind of pregnancy you are going to have, so I’m glad I asked so many questions.

Mom-Approved Double Strollers for Parents of Twins

With plenty of double strollers on the market, it’s hard to know which ones would work well for a family with twins. When we were expecting twins we spent a lot of time researching double strollers, specifically ones that would hold two non-sitting infants. Often, a double stroller is designed for an older child and a baby. Especially when you shop online, it is important to know whether the stroller you are considering is best for 2 different-aged children or two infants. After much research, these are the double strollers I would recommend to parents of twins.

Disclosure: Some of the links may be affiliate.

Graco Duoglider This stroller is great for twins from birth to 40lbs. If you have a Graco Classic Connect infant carseat, you can just transfer the babies from the car straight to the stroller. This is a lifesaver when you find yourself at your destination and one or both babies are asleep. It’s no bueno to have to remove them from a carseat and potentially wake a sleeping baby!

The Baby Trend Double Snap-n-Go stroller frame is a great alternative to the carseat combo strollers. Just like the Graco Duoglider, you can simply snap carseats right into the stroller frame. It is universal, so you can use any carseat with it. We were given one of these as a hand-me-down from a friend. It worked great for our family because we also had 2 different hand-me-down car seats, and each of them were able to fit in this frame. Of course, the girls did outgrow it eventually but it was a lifesaver for those quick trips to the grocery store with twins or on one of our many doctor’s visits during the first few months.

Peg Perego’s Duette is like the Cadillac of double strollers. Its seats are cushy and comfortable, and is compatible with Peg Perego’s carseats as well. You can position the seats so that they face each other or face out, or even face backwards. It folds easily and has a innovative steering-wheel style mobility system. We never had one, as they are outside of our price range. My only complaint would be that, while the underneath storage basket is large, there aren’t any cupholders for mom’s cafe mocha! Aside from that, this is a remarkable stroller that I would have bought if I had the disposable income for it.

The Combi Cosmo Twin Stroller is pretty cool. I love this stroller because it is pretty narrow as far as side-by-side strollers go. Be warned: You can only snap ONE infant car seat into it so in my opinion it is better suited for older babies. Yes, the seats do recline but they don’t go back very far. Our little newborn babies slid around too much at this angle and we opted to hold off on putting them in the side-by-side until they were big enough to sit on their own. The Combi is more compact than other side-by-sides and folds up easily, making it convenient for busy moms.

Jogging Strollers

Where jogging strollers are concerned, the Schwinn Turismo double jogging stroller is a tough competitor. It glides easily, has cupholders for mom and tots, AND mp3-compatible speakers mounted into the canopies! It doesn’t support tiny newborns well, but twin moms aren’t doing a lot of exercise the first few months anyway. If you’re like me you were a zombie for the first 4 months! 🙂

Of course, nothing beats the quality and reliability of BOB brand strollers. Like the Schwinn, it isn’t compatible with car seats. But it is a top-rated stroller for jogging and walking. If you have the budget for one of these, they come highly recommended by moms and dads alike.

We’ve had both a side-by-side stroller and a tandem stroller and there are pros and cons to each of them. One of the major drawbacks of the side-by-side stroller is that they may not fit through all doorways and they are tough to get through the aisles of crowded stores. On the other hand, the tandem strollers are so long they can make you feel like you’re driving an old Lincoln Continental. In the end we were the most comfortable with a tandem stroller because it was easier to maneuver through crowded spaces. Which would you prefer? A tandem or side-by-side stroller?

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